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Monday, January 16, 2012

The Early Years

By Dennis Edwards:

Chapter 1 - The Early Years!

Recently I have been reading through the documents I presented to my local draft board back in the year or so before receiving my notice for induction into military service in November 1971. I was asked by the board to explain my beliefs and where, from whom and how I arrived at them. I will quote from the documented I presented to the board in this first part of "My Story." Remember, I was 21 when writing this.

"I am the second son of Roman Catholic middle-class parents. My parents are good people. My father is a good-natured man who reads only the comics and the sports page. My mother passes the time away with television soap operas. I have never talked seriously with my parents, but I remember in high school my mother´s words in regard to my sister´s dating...."Do what comes naturally," which I interpret as, "Do what you think is right." It is from my parents that the philosophy of love has been so deeply ingrained in me, though I suspect they are not aware of it."

Comment from my sister: Hmmmm - all very interesting - and this is YOUR story - but my memories of your growing up don't really jive with your memories. When were you a rebellious teenager - or an average student? Daddy just read the comics and sports? You have got to be kidding me! Daddy was much more informed than that . . . you just didn't take the time to discover that. Mommy spent time with soap operas? Mommy was the glue - not only for us, but for her entire family . . . she too, was pretty informed about what was happening in the world - she was extremely liberal, even more so than Daddy. Perhaps they never showed you that side of themselves when you were young, but I discovered it when I was 17 and working for Eugene McCarthy's primary campaign for president. As for Mommy telling me to do what comes naturally, I only told you that in recent years, and it really did not have anything to do with my casual dating. And what kind of falling out did you have with Daddy when you were a teen?

My Response: Carol, I wrote this back in 1969 or ´70 when I was going through my identity crisis. Well, you remember my temper. Dad went to slap me a few times when mom accused me falsely of doing something and I responded physically. I must have been around 15-16. I can remember one time in the car when Mom had accused me of eating some cake she had saved to give to Mrs. Aiello. The other time was in the hall outside the bathroom. I do not remember what that one was about, but I high-tailed out of the house for the rest of the day. After that our communication level was zero! I considered myself an average student because many of the kids in my class were really smart and comparatively speaking I was average. On moral issues, I may have been above average in that I tried to be a good Christian and do unto others as I would have them do unto me. This got me in trouble sometimes as I stood up to the school “hoods” that were going to beat up one of my friends, David Bogenrief. But I did not always hold up to my beliefs especially during the time when I became friends with the Jake the class clown from my older brother´s class.

Carol´s additional comment: You should change chapter 1. You have oversimplified our parents. Do you not remember that we used to get 3 newspapers a day? (Star Ledger in the AM, Courier News in the afternoon and the Newark Evening News later) Do you remember that they always stayed up to watch the late news even though they watched the evening news? It seems so unfair to say your mother passed her time watching soap operas - yes she had them on all the time - but she was so much more than that. ASK MRS. COX. Daddy carried the worries trying to make ends meet with 4 kids - working overtime every day. Then he had to come home to us - running around fighting and all - being smart asses - yuck. They did not know how to deal with kids very well - but they did fine dealing with us as adults. She may not have been the best mother, but Mommy was the best friend to many people.

My Response: She was a good mother and I got a lot closer to her through our communications in the mail after I moved abroad. I remember crying intensely when I heard that she had died. She was a good listener and many of our neighbors and relatives would open up their hearts and pour out their problems to her. She was not a gossip and kept many “secrets” that had been shared with her. I know she loved me even though she found it hard to understand all that I was going through as I got older.

Article to the military continued:

"I attended public school and with childhood resistance the Tuesday afternoon Catechism classes. As a young Catholic, I learned to fear the "Almighty Lord" from nuns who seemed out of the tradition of Jonathan Edwards. In my childhood years, I would (every night before sleep) say prayers for all the people I liked and especially for those I disliked. My fear of God made me overly conscious of my behavior. I constantly watched and scrutinized my behavior to be aware of sins."

"In the sixth grade, I was appointed captain of the safety patrol, though I hated the leadership position because of my shyness and my inability to tell others what they should do. With the advent of Junior High School came puberty and peer group relations. At age fifteen, I had a complete falling out with my father and our relationship remained distant until just recently. In High School, I was very religious and obsessively conscious of the commandments. I tried to imitate the life of Christ. I was an average student, with friends that were "jocks," and friends that were "nerds." The most intriguing reading I did in High School was Thoreau´s Walden Pond. I also enjoyed reading Emerson. One sentence I remember reading in one of his essays still remains with me: "Every Stoic was a Stoic, but where in Christendom is the Christian."

"In my senior year I gained a deep relationship with a girl, my first intimate girl friend. I seldom read a book or the daily newspaper. I graduated High School president of my senior class, with the American Legion School Award for courage, honor, leadership, patriotism, scholarship and service. I had a vague hope of becoming a social worker or "something like that." I toyed with the idea of joining the military "to do my duty." But I was accepted to a college in Ohio and decided to go there instead."

To read the rest of the story go to the following link:

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