Changing Deeply Ingrained Habits and Mindsets

By Maria Fontaine

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We all know that personal change doesn’t come easily. It’s especially difficult to change a habit, first reaction, or mindset that has been with you for practically your whole life. It’s almost impossible to change such things. Note the word “almost.” It is possible! But because habits can be so very deeply ingrained, it often requires the added boost of supernatural power to perform the miracle of change. Your desperation, along with your will to work hard, will enable the Lord to help you to make the change that you desire.

Following is a message from Jesus with practical tips regarding achieving long-lasting change and overcoming deeply ingrained habits, reactions, and mindsets.

He said:

Change is a word of tremendous power! Change affects every sphere of the earth and the heavens, and is, in great part, the driving force behind all things. Almost everything that is a great accomplishment, a forward advancement, a noble achievement, is aproduct of change. Change has been the wings of every great man or woman—famous or in­famous—throughout history. Those who have launched out to do new things, to experiment, to remedy problems, to find solutions, to pioneer, to achieve the impossible, to take great strides for mankind, have been embracers of the word “change.”

How is it then that so many dread change when it comes to their personal lives? Yes, change is difficult, and it’s not always positive. People can change for the worse rather than for the better. But in this case I am speaking of change as a tool for any man, woman, or child who wishes to cause an effect, make a difference, help another, better themselves, or allow Me to bring about forward motion, movement, and progress through them.

You don’t have to accept your circumstances. You don’t have to be satisfied with the way you are, the way you think, or the way you feel. You can change things! Your weaknesses can be strengthened, your faith can grow, your spirit can soar, your endurance can be prolonged. There’s not one person on this earth, saved or un­saved, who can’t change something in their life or world for the better.

However, you, as Christians, know Me, and thus can ask for My help in making changes—and can then experience changes that would normally be beyond your power, but are not beyond Mine.

Those who allow Me room to work in their lives see great change—mental change, emotional change, physical change. Change can result in many positive manifestations, such as healing, increased happi­ness, better health, more love, increased enjoyment in your circumstances or surroundings, greater trust, more confidence, assurance, peace, delight, joy, laughter, fulfillment, satisfaction, and on the list goes!

The fruits of change make up a long list, and these are gifts and blessings that all My children want and sincerely desire and seek. So ­often My children pray for these gifts that come as a result of change, but they don’t want the change itself. They don’t see that the two are interlocked, that the change comes before the gifts and blessings. In order to receive the personal blessings of change, you have to let go of self and fear and worry, and entrust your life to My hands.

Many pray and cry out to Me for help to overcome their sins, weaknesses, and inabilities. I long to help them. I love to help them. But they must allow Me the opportunity to change them. Depending on the request and the situation, some change can be effected quickly; other changes take more time. Some changes seem more doable; other changes seem to be more miraculous and even impossible.

When a negative habit is long-standing, many people have difficulty letting go of it. You may want to get rid of it and obtain victory, but because it’s been a part of you for so long, you can lack faith that you can actually make the change.

But as you are yielded, willing, receptive, obedient, humble, and open to My voice, I will give clear instructions to you, or will lead you to godly counsel and help in making the change. If you follow My counsel and do what I tell you, and if you are willing to persevere and not give up, you will find the change that you seek.

Additionally, you must believe that you can change, and that I will help you. Anyone can change with My help, and in order to help bring about a great change in your life, I ask you to believe My promises and come to Me with your heart full of them, claiming them and standing on them.—Even if you have to pray, “Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.”1 The one who believes and believes and continues to believe is the one who gets great answers and sees great changes.

Changing something in your life that needs improvement is not an easy road, but it is a road of great reward. Those who are willing to fight and struggle through the land of personal change will inherit the promises and see the fulfillment of their labors.

There’s hardly a greater joy than to see a beautiful change in someone’s heart and life, to see the manifestation of such a powerful miracle. It’s not what they’ve done, or what I alone have done, but what we have done together—a teamwork and close partnership of one who yields to his or her Master, and the Master who gives them a gift. They then take the gift and utilize it, and reap the blessings and benefits.

In order to make big and lasting changes, it helps if the person wants change and wants it badly. It’s not enough to think, “Oh, sure, that would be great if I could change and become a more considerate person, or someone who is less sensitive.” You have to want it, to even be desperate for it. Change is not handed to you on a silver platter; you must actively desire it and be willing to put forth the effort necessary. You must, through diligence and desperation, take the steps that I show you to take if you are to make progress and reap the good results.

So, what are some simple steps that you can take to change in an area that you’ve struggled with long and hard? What if, despite all your trying and desperation and prayer, you don’t seem to be getting anywhere? What if you still seem to be at square one, and you feel like resigning yourself to always being that way? Is there hope for you? Yes, there certainly is!

I’ll give you some suggestions of steps you can take if you are looking to bring about change in your life, which you can personalize by coming to Me about your situation. Sometimes I might suggest fervent prayer with others. Other times you might benefit from humbly making yourself accountable to those you’re close to by asking them to help you. Yet other times regular desperate private prayer, between you and Me, would be the boost in the spirit that is needed.

I will give you what you need in order to gain the victories through lasting change that you are seeking. Here are some general points that may be a help and guide to you:

1) Thank Me for the ability to change that I make available to you, through My power.

2) Outline on paper the areas that you feel you wish to change in. It can be helpful to concentrate on one at a time in order to devote your attention to it fully.

3) Seek Me for the faith that you can change, and that I will help you at every step.

4) Read faith-building Word to increase your faith in My power to change. Read about the miracles that I’ve done through­out the ages.

5) Ask yourself how badly you want this change. Are you willing to make sacrifices and work hard for it? Is it worth it to you? Be ready to fight for as long as it takes, knowing that the rewards are high as you receive the change that you’ve requested.

6) Come before Me and ask Me in prayer for the specific change that you want. Be willing to ask for prayer from others. There is great power and an added boost in showing your humility and dependence on Me in this way.

7) Receive promises from Me about the change that I can help you achieve. Ask Me what your part should be and I will give you instructions to follow. Ask Me for specific ways to react, to respond, in order to form new habits, contrary to your old ways of ­doing things, seeing things, and responding to things.

8) Praise Me for working in your life. Praise Me for changing you. Praise, praise, praise! Don’t allow yourself to doubt or become discouraged if you think you’re not changing. Re­fuse to give in. The victory and change is yours, so claim it by faith. Then put feet to your prayers and faith by continuing to work hand in hand with Me, as I tell you how to keep progressing to the victory and eventual reward.

The most important point is the state of your heart. The humble, desperate, and yielded heart I will not despise. I will work with you for months and even years, if need be, to give you the change that you desire. I will be your personal counselor and I will never give up on you. Even if your progress is slow, pro­g­ress will be made. I will anoint and empower you and give you dispensations of grace and supernatural strength and encouragement to continue on, even when you fall and make mistakes.

I love to effect change, and I especially love the delight and joy it brings to one of My children to see that I have done the miracle for them, with them, and through them. As we work together, I am able to create the miracle of change in your heart and life, and this is a beautiful and wonderful thing.

Don’t despair over something that isn’t right in your life—ask Me to help you to changeit! It’s often a long road, and there are difficulties along the way, but the victory is well worth it.

Hang in there! Change, though painful, costly, and sometimes almost unbear­able, is worth it. If you ask for My help, I’m more than willing to give it to you.

Originally published December 2000. Updated and republished May 2012.
Read by Bethany Kelly.


1 Mark 9:24.

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